Rating: 💋 💋 💋 😘
Hellooooo
I live for a grand entrance. They are my greatest life's work, ma joie de vivre, the reason I wake up in the morning. I hope kicking the door open via gif translated well onto whatever device you are using to read this post.
So, how has everybody been? Has anything exciting happened in the past ten months? (Non-sarcastic answers only, pls.) Are your summers off to a nice start? I certainly hope so!
Pretty much as soon as I stopped writing, I wondered how I ever had the time to, my life was just go-go-go. I cannot believe it has been ten months. I cannot believe all that has happened in the time since I last wrote. While I have been cooking a lot, most of my meals have been European dinnertime late and American fast because of my work schedule, and I really have not been out to eat all that much. Of the few times I did go out, mostly last fall, none of it made me think "Ugh, I have to write a review about this." My work-life balance has lately been, all work, no life, pretty much. Depending on what job that is, I make friends along the way and have a super great time, so it is fine. The Unlovely Miss Rona and my friend's summer travel schedules also make it incredibly difficult to link up and have fun. Gorgeous gorgeous gorgeous girls work their booties off, as the saying goes.
According to all these celebrities I admire, your early 20s are a lot of hard work and looming life questions and not very fun, which makes me feel better. I am sorry they had that experience, I wish everyone nothing but joy, but if I feel how superstars like Issa Rae and Anne Hathaway felt when they were my age, maybe I am actually on the right track? Maybe? Just nod, thanks. I will say, it really makes me appreciate every little bit of excitement that comes my way. For example, last month Shannon dragged me out to trivia in Brooklyn. I was in the middle of a very stressful job assignment and so overtired and you know what? I had the best time. Not only did I have so much fun, our power team won Trivia! This means we now have a gift card to have more fun. Wild! I am looking forward to it!
Winners taking all!
Here we have Shannon and our friend Ian with our trophy gift certificate. How thrilling!
My favorite part about good things and good people is that positive energy like that often replicates, so you experience more good things and meet more good people as a result.
While at trivia, Ian highly recommended this little spot in Greenpoint called Bernie's. Next thing you know, Shannon and I had more fun plans. Bernie's is tiny and takes no reservations, so you have to go with a game plan. It opens at five o'clock, so I got there at quarter to in order to hold our spot. I was third seating in line. By the time they opened, the line wrapped around the block.
You have been warned.
I would also advise you to check out the menu before going. It is a tidy little thing with great options, but not very many options. If you want spicy or exotic, tonight is not the night for Bernie's. If you want some down-to-earth American diner vibes, you're good to go. Line up on the block with the rest of us. I knew, for instance, that I wanted the burger. They looked so beautiful on their instagram, and cheeseburgers are such a rare treat for me. I practically had no choice. The burger called to me, I was helpless.
Shannon and I tucked away at a tiny table in the corner and immediately hit the server with our order - a beer for her, a cider for me, and two cheeseburgers, please. We quickly received two patties covered in cheddar on a sesame bun with tomato and shredded lettuce on top, and dill pickles slices, chipotle aïoli, and crispy fries on the side - happy Sunday to US. Shannon gave me her pickle in accordance with our sister contract. Then, I popped a Lactaid.
Yes, it is sad but true, I cannot eat dairy products. I have been going to the doctor since I was twelve because of stomach pain and (*whispers) acne and just flat-out discomfort. Nothing gross, I just have not been comfortable for thirteen years. NBD. When we originally went to the doctor, I asked them if it might be lactose intolerance or acid reflux because the initial agitator for me was pizza. I cannot eat pizza. They immediately blew right past that and I have spent years seeing all different sorts of doctors who tested the bacterium in my intestines (everyone has it, do not judge), made me breathe into bags and silly things like that, assigned so many blood tests I am an absolute pro, put me on this or that pill that mysteriously never worked, etc. etc. etc. but never a diagnosis. I was broken with absolutely no explanation why. I love the rebel without a cause, sheer chaos vibes that sentence elicits, but in practice it just sucks. You're, like, the weird girl at the dinner who cannot eat stuff, but also cannot explain why. And I mean, as far as the acne goes, I had no idea it had any relation to the other problems. I thought I just had lackluster pores with sadistic tendencies. For over a decade, no doctor could diagnose me, and then you know who did accurately ascertain and fix my problem?
Me.
I am kidding. It was not just me. I diagnosed myself with the help of my favorite, esteemed supermodel Taylor Hill.
I am not joking. Doctors could not do it, but two girls who work in the arts and know how to rock a pair of stilettos cracked the code.
I was watching a Vogue video of hers (I do so love the Vogue videos) in which she briefly mentions what she does to prepare for a runway. And it wasn't about being skinny or being super-toned, or whatever it is people might unfortunately expect. It was that, though cheesy food is her favorite, she stops eating it just around her runway dates because she has acne, and when she stops eating cheese, her acne goes away.
*Mind blown, volcanically.
So I switched to plant-based cheese in addition to the almond/oatmilk I already drink, started buying almond- oat- or plant-based yogurt, and never looked back. It has been three months now and my skin is so much better it is ridiculous. I am so much more comfortable, feel generally freer, and also love my body so much more than I ever have. I thought giving up cheese would suck because, you know, we have had a close, deep relationship. Turns out it was a toxic one. The dairy substitutes have come so far, they taste so good, and the pay off? Priceless. I no longer feel at war with or controlled by my body, it is incredible!
And for days when I feel like going off the rails, such as at Bernie's, there's Lactaid for that. (This is not sponsored, but it should be. Violife - where is my check?) I still probably get a zit or two when I indulge, and Lactaid only lasts an hour so you gotta take it with military precision, but I can enjoy a cheeseburger pain-free. How beautiful is that?
I repeat: how beautiful is that? Did you see that burger? The patties were so mouthwatering, drenched in Kill MK Gleefully Cheddar that had such a rich, delightful flavor, and the veg on top made it healthy! Plus, the tomato and lettuce were good palate cleansers. The fries were so crisp and perfectly salted it was hard not to eat all of them. I think I left five on the plate to demonstrate my steely willpower, yes, thank you, applause IS necessary. The sauce was, I mean, too good to be allowed honestly. I found that it brightened both the flavor of the burger and spuds, and if I could've taken a vat to go, I would have. Now, this is all really simple food, but sometimes that is exactly what you need. For the highest quality, non-fussy fare - Bernie's is your spot.
And now, my lovely readers, let me introduce you to: my achilles heel. The undoing of Mary Kate. The Joker laughing at my foolishness. The reason my Lactaid pills still won't make eye contact with me:
The Bernie Brownie Sundae.
Sounds nice, right?
It's not.
It's the devil.
And it tastes just as scrumptious as you'd imagine a devil might.
I mean, what is this meaning of THIS?
I had heard their ice cream was good. Sure, the burger chose me for my main, but I trekked to Brooklyn so that I could have a sundae on Sunday as a little summer kick-off. So Shannon and I ordered our desserts, innocent, impressionable young cherubs that we were.
And the food runner carted out two sundaes the size of my head. And he was LAUGHING at us. LAFFING. I believe he said, " Wow, I have never seen a table order two before."
Back into the kitchen with you, my pride cannot take it! ðŸ˜
This was my first experience with hot fudge and, all things considered, another beautiful thing humans invented - wow. Not as genius as when we did the croissant but very nice nonetheless. I ate the maraschino cherry on mine but refused Shannon's as a gesture towards my blood sugar. Whipped cream has long been the way to my heart. When people pair cold sweet vanilla ice cream and a hot thick brownie, I become a woman even I do not recognize. Which is all to say, some melted ice cream went back into the kitchen but I ate a good 2/3 of that sundae. It just kept looking at me and it was so beautiful and, now that I've experienced it myself on the front lines, I think we need to cut Eve some slack.
Next time, all I am ordering is a sundae and I am bringing an entourage. I simply want a sundae and a clatter of spoons, thank you.
Beautiful experience, I went home and did some deep breathing exercises. Recovery did not take too too long.
Overall, definitely worth adding to your NYC Dining List.
And as for what has kept me so long from writing a blog: from September to late March I was taking Acting classes. Love my teacher, Ed, he is the GOAT. I also got a job babysitting a two year old. Additionally, I briefly had an event dancer job but that did not really vibe with me and now I have just started as a mostly remote, part-time Executive Assistant. So, essentially, I spend half the day running around with a small child and the other half clickety-clacking away at a keyboard. Except it does not really split that smoothly and my hours are a delightful hodepodge. I wake up early, and I eat dinner at 8pm, and sometimes I send emails to my boss with delightfully precise language about conferences and expense reports when I am, in fact, typing on my phone while hanging upside down on a jungle gym because it makes the child laugh. According to Reilly, I have "like 3.5 jobs" because I also act and model. On what, you may ask? On whatever project takes interest in me and I take interest in them right back. Street style photo shoots, music videos, stock footage creations, social media ads, commercials, short films, feature films, TV shows. I often play Student, 18TLY (which means you are an adult but people will totally believe that you are a fifteen-year old, it's an honor for sure), Girlfriend, Dancer, Model, Energetic Woman, Bride, and sometimes we get into more complicated territory, Ã la Manic Pixie Dream Girl Types. I have lent my skills in order to sell patio paving stones, sunglasses, face oils, beef jerky, and whatever other concept the creative director is issuing. Here are some examples of what my life has really looked like these past several months:
Being on set and creating art really makes me happier than anything else and I hope that I get to do it more and more until I only have one job, the Best Job in the World. There really is no other life. I will just keep chugging along until Wes Anderson realizes that I am just the girl for that part he has been looking to cast. Or Sam Levinson. Or Quentin Tarantino. Or Martin Scorsese. I mean, really, I am not a picky girl. I just want it to be good. I want everything I do to be great. Easy peasy, really.
My inner-self, always:
Sending you lots of sunshine, a warm and refreshing breeze, and maybe some water ice. Yeah, that sounds good! Water ice for everyone!
I don't know when I will write next, but I am going to shoot for in less than ten months. How does that sound? In the meantime, thank you so much for reading! I hope you are having a great day or, if not, the universe can turn it around for you. Take care of you 💛
XX,
MK